The Power of the 1% Change with Molly Smith

In this episode, we dive into an engaging conversation with health and mindset coach Molly Smith. Molly shares her transformative journey from being overworked and reliant on external validation to redefining her life through small, impactful changes. She discusses the importance of contending for health, the significance of making incremental improvements, and her decision to stop drinking alcohol—an act that substantially benefited her mental clarity and overall well-being. Molly also emphasizes the foundational role health plays in enabling success and offers practical advice on creating better habits. This discussion is particularly inspiring for women over 40 navigating corporate roles and personal health challenges, underscoring that meaningful change is possible through consistent, small efforts.

Key Highlights:

00:00 Introduction to Not Made To Be Subtle

01:09 Meet Molly Smith: Health and Mindset Coach

02:28 The Journey of Self-Discovery

05:24 Climbing the Corporate Ladder

08:35 Health Transformation and Coaching

20:24 Contending for Your Health

24:18 The Decision to Quit Alcohol

32:54 Contending for Health: A Personal Journey

34:10 The Power of Small Habits: 1% Changes

35:31 Building Healthy Routines: Practical Tips

39:49 Mindset Shifts and Personal Growth

42:22 The Impact of Sobriety on Success

50:06 Mindset Inventory: A Tool for Self-Improvement

59:04 Final Thoughts and Future Plans

Connect with Molly 
molly@mollypositivepants.com
https://www.facebook.com/molly.m.smith.90
https://www.instagram.com/molly.positivepants/

Let's Connect!

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Transcript

Caytie: 0:01

Welcome to Not Made To Be Subtle where we celebrate the art of embracing fear, pushing boundaries and making a statement in a world that often expects us to be subtle. I'm your host, Caytie Langford. I'm a full time real estate investor, but along the way I was a nonprofit fundraiser turned executive coach. I once stood at the intersection of This is everything that I've ever wanted. And is this really it? I've learned so much along the way. And now this podcast will be your go to destination for candid discussions with me and with other bad ass women who dared to ask the same, is this it? And decided to chase after more. Stay tuned for riveting stories. unfiltered conversations and actionable advice that will move you from where you are to where you want to go. Welcome to not made to be subtle because you, my dear, you were never made to be subtle.

Caytie Langford: 1:09

Today is a very exciting and special day for me because I have my brilliant, beautiful, wonderful friend, Miss Molly Smith. Molly is a health and mindset coach. She is a multi passionate entrepreneur. She also is an alum of the same Alma mater, our all girls school that we went to back in Dallas, Texas, Ursuline Academy. She absolutely is still rocking her corporate job, but most of all, she is using all of the work that she has put in over the last so many years to influence and impact the lives of other people. I've known Molly now for about seven or eight years. I actually met her at a speaking gig. She became one of my very first executive coaching clients and I've gotten to be with her through so many transitions and pivots in her life. What I love the most about Molly is her infectious and enthusiastic attitude. She really has become Molly Positive Pants, which you'll hear more about. Molly, welcome to Not Made To Be Subtle.

Molly Smith: 2:23

Thank you so much for having me. I'm so glad to be here.

Caytie Langford: 2:27

Lady, I'm so glad to be here. And as I was just thinking about our conversation, as I was also saying to you, before we hit record, there are some podcasts when I have to prepare and prepare because I don't know somebody. And then there are podcasts like this where I'm like, Oh, we're going to have a catch up conversation. And what's cool about it is so many women are going to get to benefit from our conversation. But like. It's cool that we just really get to catch up and see what the heck's going on with each

Molly Smith: 2:55

Love it. Love it. Yes, let's do it.

Caytie Langford: 2:58

Me too. Okay, I love it. Alright, so let us start with this. Not Made To Be Subtle. One of the reasons that I started this podcast is because in My life, many people have told me that I've got to calm down. I've got to be something other than who I was. I've got to be less than, and I just want to hear from you. Has that ever happened? And if it's happened, are there specific times in your life that it's happened? Is there specific moments when you are that version of yourself that it's happened? Tell me Molly. Has anyone ever said you need to be more subtle?

Molly Smith: 3:41

Well, I'll say in high school and in college, I was too subtle. I was too subtle. I was silent. I was quiet. Except for like when I was younger, I was always a talker. Always the talker, right? But throughout my life, I've quieted myself because I wasn't sure. That what I had to say was worth it.

Caytie Langford: 4:04

Wow.

Molly Smith: 4:05

And so I am in a season even now where I'm like I am done being subtle. I'm going to step into and speak about the things that absolutely made a change in my life. And I'm tired of being hiding in plain sight. So definitely not made to be subtle here, but at age 48. I'm coming out of my shell. And being nothing, nothing like being subtle

Caytie Langford: 4:35

yeah. This is a really excellent topic and I'm excited that we have gone here because I want to know Molly Was there something? Some message that you may have received either consciously or subconsciously That told you Hey Don't be talking, Hey, what you have to say might not be worth it. If you really think back or maybe it was just you saying it to yourself, but kind of talk us through that, because I think there are a lot of women. Who come to a point in their life where they do shrink, do say, Oh, nope, I can't be actually who I am.

Molly Smith: 5:24

Yeah, I think that for me, in my early, after college and my early career, I was always striving. I was always working. I was always trying to figure out what was next. And not realizing that there's joy in the journey of growing there. And so it really wasn't until I discovered that I was made for more than climbing the corporate ladder. Can I get an amen? You were in my life and that journey when I was climbing the corporate ladder and then when I pivoted in 2019 with my health and then Even though I continued to climb the corporate ladder something shifted in me in that window, in that, early to mid 2019, where it's like, no, no, no, I'm meant for more and I'm meant for bigger. And not that what I was doing was insignificant. It wasn't that it was insignificant. It was that I really found alignment I can look back and say it was alignment and uncovering of my purpose in the channel through which that I can make an impact in the world.

Caytie Langford: 6:34

And so just to share with the woman who is listening, when we first met and the reason why we started working together was the corporate ladder climb,

Molly Smith: 6:45

Yeah, yes, it

Caytie Langford: 6:48

You were a director at a company and we were working together to position you to a VP level. And we worked through that whole strategy. You became a VP, crushed it in that role. And then you and I, you know, just became friends, right? We weren't working together. And then you got a call to go be in the C suite at a company.

Molly Smith: 7:11

Yep.

Caytie Langford: 7:12

And you were like, Oh my gosh, talk to me and help me through this.

Molly Smith: 7:16

Caytie.

Caytie Langford: 7:18

Yeah, so exactly. Help. So we did that and you got hired for that role. You became a chief customer officer and went through that journey and you've had another pivot in corporate America. But I just think that it is really fascinating that you are what I would call the corporate ladder success. You climbed the corporate ladder and I think that even when we talk about, you know, one of the things that we have in common is I did too. I climbed the corporate ladder. I also got to the C suite and then I got there and I was like, is this really what I want? And yours, I think you had a shift before you got there. So talk to us a little bit about 2019 and specifically Molly. I think there was Molly leading up to that who was a total badass. I don't want anyone to look at your journey and be like, Oh, no. Molly was amazing. Molly was a hard worker, goal oriented, crushing it. A leader, a female leader in her company, a leader in her company, other women look up to her, all of the things, but there was a shift. So talk to us a little bit about that.

Molly Smith: 8:35

So in that season, so I was in that VP role that you helped me help me create the position and then get myself put into it. Which a fun story. But from there I was in that role and I done all of the work. I was working 60, 70 hours a week, but I was doing it at the expense. Of my health, my relationships, my friendships, all of those things, right? And I can see now I was really tying my self worth and my confidence to what I did for a living. And the validation, the external validation that I received in that company, and it was. I got a lot of it. I got a lot of it. And so it fed my desire to pour more into that. But in early 2019 I really kind of got to the end of myself. It's like I felt like I was a success in business. My kids were doing okay. My marriage is okay, but my health was in the tank. And I had, this Pre pandemic. So I was in an office five days a week. And quite honestly, like many women who are ambitious and striving for more, you put some things on the back burner. Well, what happened to me is like all of my clothes were not starting to fit. And so my corporate wardrobe that I spent thousands of dollars on, like was all getting tight and it's like, okay, I got to do something. This is, I have put my health on the back burner for too long. And so I started looking at how I could drop some weight and improve my health. Now, for me, that exercise was a hundred percent vanity. I wanted to fit into my, Corporate wardrobe and increase my confidence and all that what I didn't understand or realize when I started the program that helped me get healthy was that I was stumbling into something that was going to change the trajectory of my life and my family's life because what I did wasn't. a diet. You can do a diet. You can drop the weight. You can do whatever. But if you don't shift the habits and the lifestyle and the mindsets, man, alive that all goes back to a mindset, right? You don't shift those things. You are going to revert back to what you know, what is comfortable, even if it doesn't serve you. And so we'll talk about alcohol at some juncture but in that moment I had stumbled across something where I was seeing success in dropping. I had 50 pounds to lose. My blood pressure was unregulated. It was high. I was on multiple medications. I have a couple of health conditions I was struggling with. And I started to see success and started to stack wins in an area that I had struggled with for over a decade. And that sparked something in me. It sparked something in me and people started to notice, right? Because you're a little bit of a walking billboard when you're really overweight and you start slimming down, people are going to ask you what you're doing. And that's actually how I stumbled into health coaching. Somebody asked me what I was doing, and I shared it. It was like, oh, my gosh, it's so easy. And you can do all these things and it works and all the things. And so I stumbled into health coaching a couple of months into my journey. This is my five year coaching anniversary this month. I've been coaching, health coaching for five years. And what I uncovered was a community of people who were so focused on going to the next level in their health it's like a personal development community with a side dose of health, it's phenomenal. And so I started to see these people who were living. You know, wonderful lives and they were pursuing health. And it's not that their lives were easy. Like I didn't see easy, but what I saw was meaningful. And I saw people generating another stream of income in a way that would impact others. And I thought, why not me?

Caytie Langford: 12:43

Yeah. Yeah. And so we're going to talk about this in just a second, but I feel like we did just jump really fast and that, that tends to happen, right? We don't really talk about the messy middle. And I think had I not been part of your life during the messy middle, I'd be like, yeah, let's just talk about where you are today. I want to go back for a minute. And really talk to the woman who right now is in your shoes. So you were working how many hours?

Molly Smith: 13:20

So I was working, you know, 60 to 70 hours a week. And the people that I worked with were like my extended family. So we even spent time together outside of work, happy hours. We hung out together on weekends. Like they were my people. I'd been at the company for like 20 years. And I was chasing significance. I was chasing impact. I was chasing worth in all the wrong places. I can say that now looking back, but in the moment it was like, I'm committed to the mission of this company and I've put in so much effort. I could still have the influence, the impact, the success without putting in 60 to 70 hours a week.

Caytie Langford: 14:00

Right. So two things. One, external validation was like your golden carrot. It was the thing you were very big on. Tell me what a win is and I will get it. And from a corporate perspective, that was phenomenal. People loved having you on their team. Cause they're like, if we just tell Molly what the goal is, this woman will hit it. And not only will she hit it, most of the time you've knocked it out of the park. Right? So, so if you're listening to this and you're like, wow, I do that. Let's just keep paying attention to Molly's story. Number two, I remember us having a conversation one day and we were talking about specifically your. Work ethic. I think that's what you probably might've been used. Like, even if you didn't say that back then, that was probably where this fit. It was this idea that you were the first person to get in the office and the last one to leave. And will you just tell us from your perspective, kind of what that conversation was like, because I will say for me, it was a moment in coaching that my jaw hit the floor. Cause I was like, Oh my God, what is she doing? But tell us what

Molly Smith: 15:18

Yeah, I remember that conversation like it was yesterday, Caytie, that was this conversation was a trajectory shifter in my life. You asked me, you asked me, you know, do you think that your boss is working 60 to 70 hours a week or the CEO of the company is working 60 to 70 hours a week? And I laughed and I was like, no way. There's no way. I know, I know he doesn't. Lovely guy. Lovely guy. No way he was working as hard as I was. And you asked me a very pivotal question. You said, what would happen if you started work at 830 and you left at 530? Like, what would happen? Like, would the wheels of the bus of your department come off the rails if you worked 830 to 530? And, and the answer, the answer to that was, like, no, no, like, that's the rational, logical, no, of course it's not. And so you challenged me to say, Try it. Try putting some healthy boundaries around your work and see what happens. And girl, life changing because you know what happened? I showed up at 8. 30. I was more productive in my day because I knew I was walking out the door at 5. 30. And I told my team about it and they even held me accountable. I'd have, you know, a guy that worked on my team. He's like, Hey, 545. I'm like, ah, I'm walking out the door. I lived it and then I lived it out loud. It completely changed how I view work because if you work 12 hours a day. unless you're an entrepreneur and you're building something from the ground up, that might be different, but you're working in corporate America. You know, working 12 hours a day as the norm and not the anomaly. Something's not right. You're either not working efficiently. You're not working productively. You've got to delegate you or something, right? and what I found is I showed up better at work. I was more productive. My creativity was better. And I created a margin in my life, so I had time to come home and unwind from the day before I went to soccer practice or taekwondo or whatever I was doing with my kids, and I showed up better for my family. And at that point, I just started to coach other people in their health. And now I had margin for that. And I realized that I do love talking to people. Right? Because before when I was working 12 hours a day, I would come home. I would pour myself a glass of wine. I'd play candy crush on my phone. I needed to unwind from my day. My husband would come home and he'd say, how was your day? And I'm like, dude, I just lived it. I don't want to debrief it with you. Right? Like, I don't, I'm, you know, and so there was a lack of connection there because I was pedal to the metal because I was chasing significant success, you know, all of those kinds of things. And now I realized that I was a happier person. I was a better employee. I was a better leader, a better mom, and I had capacity to start to help other people win in their life through their health. Game changer.

Caytie Langford: 18:31

Total game changer and I'm so glad we're having this conversation because right now I'm working all the time And when you just said in a minute ago, like I get home I pour a glass of wine and I play Candy Crush I'm not pouring a glass of wine, which we will have the alcohol conversation in a minute but I definitely get on Monopoly and I'm like, don't talk to me. I need a minute to decompress. And yet at the same time especially since we've been here in Austin, like I'm not working out. I haven't done any of that. I haven't lifted a weight in like eight weeks and I can tell when I put on a sleeveless shirt I'm like, oh girl What happened to your arms because they're looking like or not only in the mirror But like if I have to lift something so we're back in a high rise So you park in the parking garage and then you have to like carry your grocery It's not from the garage to your place, like, it's a little bit further of a walk. I have to go, you know, through the parking garage, up one set of elevators, down a hallway, up another hallway, right? So thank you for reminding me as well that I need to start contending for my health. And so I do want to, I do want to take that and let's really talk about contending for health, because even though I probably have not been your most successful student, one of the cool things is, and I always say this, right? Get in the room with people who are doing things. That are different than you, that are where you want to be. And one of the rooms that I like to get in is with Molly because she is constantly talking about her health. She's constantly talking about health and wellness. And sometimes that's your body health, sometimes that's your mental health, right? If you follow her on any of her socials, You will see that she is talking about this. And so, let's talk about what the hell does contend for your health mean? And specifically us women who are, let's just say over 35, but definitely those of us over 40. Like, why should we even care about this, Molly? What does it even mean?

Molly Smith: 20:42

Well, I mean, we have this one life, right? And it is gone. In the breath, in the blink of an eye. And so if you want to do something with your life, have an impact on your family, your friends in the community, whatever it is, like, your health is the foundation of how you show up every day. And I don't know about you, but when I'm not, when I'm feeling under the weather, I am a big fat baby. Right? I don't want to do anything. I'm not showing up well for anybody. Right? And so, when we contend for our health, We are saying, yes, I am worth, I'm worth it, and I'm setting myself up to win so that I can do the work that I've been called to do while I have breath in my lungs, and so contending looks differently for everybody. Contending might be, you know, if you have weight to lose, The contending looks a little bit different, right? We're shifting habits. We're making different choices. We are choosing not to be around certain people who have habits that will influence you. If you like Caytie, for example, for you, right? Like if, if your exercise hasn't been your thing, Contending for your health in this season might be getting to the gym and that building, Taking the stairs versus the elevator. I don't know what floor you're on, but go with me here, you know? And

Caytie Langford: 22:06

Yeah.

Molly Smith: 22:06

contending is making the choice, making the decision every day. Those 1 percent decisions, those minor decisions, right? Because they add, I've been coaching for five years. I've coached hundreds of people and here's what I know to be true. The people who make the big sweeping decisions when they're highly motivated do not win in the long term. The people who win in the long term are the ones who are doing those small 1 percent things, who park in the back of the grocery store parking lot because they have to walk more steps, where you take the stairs up, right? Whatever it is, if you're looking to Change your body composition. There are lots of things you can be doing. Your seasons of contending for your health are going to look different, right? But you are making the decision that this is a priority. And for me, and I think I voice messaged this after one of your last podcasts, I was like, Oh my God, yes. Our health is the foundation through which we do everything else. It is enabler. If our health is not in alignment, if we are dealing with God forbid a disease where we have to go into treatment, right? Like those are those types of things. Like that's taking up all of your, all of your time, right? Our health is our, is the foundation and enables us to show up and do the work that we're called to do. So, you know, when I was drinking every day. I was sleeping like crap and I was waking up late and in a bad mood because I didn't feel good. And my day went infinitely worse because my mindset was in the wrong place. I felt like crap and I wasn't showing up in the assignments that I had. So I believe we all have a mission in life and we have different assignments. And so my assignments shift based on the season that I'm in, and I'm not showing up for my assignments. If I'm not taking care of my health, that is what has kept me sober for 475 days. 100%. 475

Caytie Langford: 24:08

days.

Molly Smith: 24:09

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 24:11

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Okay. So many ways to go here. Let's do this though. So if you have not already listened to my story, I dropped a podcast about, I don't know, four or five episodes ago. About my decision to walk away from alcohol. And one of the things that I'm constantly telling the women in my sphere of influence is that you've got to share what's happening in your life. So many people think, well, why would I share my wins? It makes me look like I'm a bragger. It makes me look selfish. It makes me look like I have an ego. Let me just be very clear right now to every single human that is listening. The reason why I had the ability The reason why I knew that I could do it, the reason why I felt supported that I could stop drinking is because Molly stopped drinking and she started talking about it on social media. She did 75 hard multiple times. One of our mutual friends, Liza, also saw Molly doing 75 hard. Liza decided to start doing it. Liza stopped drinking. Liza started talking about not drinking. So when I was faced with my decision in May of 2023 of not drinking, I knew that I had two friends that I could immediately go to to say, help me, what do I do? Because when I walked away from a bottle of wine to two every day, it was fucking scary and hard. And I can guarantee you that if Molly Smith had not made that decision days before I did, and she's about a hundred days further in her journey than I am, I don't think I would have had the strength to do it. Because she talked about it, Liza talked about it, and those first few weeks when it was so hard, I was reaching out to both of them. What are you doing? How do you do this? What do I need to do? Can I text you? Can I call you? So Molly, I just want to honor in you first of all, it has been the greatest change I've ever made in my life It is, it is allowing me to be the person that I'm supposed to be. It is allowing me to fully step into my assignment. And I can guarantee you that if it weren't for you, I don't, I wouldn't have done it. Like I wouldn't have. So thank you so much.

Molly Smith: 26:42

well, I love that. And, you know, I have to look back at the person who I saw my friend, Jenny. Did the same thing celebrating a hundred days sober in an electric blue bikini on January 31st when there was an ice storm and she was doing a polar plunge to celebrate her hundred days and the ripple effect. I think, gosh, you are so right. Like living out loud about these things. It's so important, you're right, like we get in our heads and we overthink it and I'm a hashtag over thinker with the best of them, but you'll see that's the reason why I post about health all the time because somebody is going to hit that feed and say, Oh, well, why not me? Right. And I don't care if it's health. I don't care if it's alcohol. I don't care if it's climbing the corporate ladder. I don't care if it's saying bye bye to the C suite, which I also did because it was not for me. And so, well, I said goodbye to that C suite. I'm doing, I'm building my own thing where I'm the founder. right. But being able to that vulnerability and that transparency, that's how people will connect. Right.

Caytie Langford: 27:54

That's right.

Molly Smith: 27:55

And that's what's going to inspire change. So Caytie, I guarantee you that there are going to be multiple people who are going to say, maybe I'm going to lay off the alcohol for a little bit because you shared your story. The ripple effect, you have no idea where the ripple effect is going to go.

Caytie Langford: 28:13

I mean, lady, it's crazy. I cannot tell you how many people reach out to me after my podcast. Just celebrated my year. I did a, a cute little video.

Molly Smith: 28:23

It was great.

Caytie Langford: 28:24

Shane. We went to the party city and got like streamers and the whole thing, but it's crazy how many women and a couple of men. I've gone to coffee with, I've texted with, I've gone to dinner with or lunch with to simply talk to them about what my journey has been like. And it's so, it's been amazing. I know that there are other people who have stopped because they were like, Oh my gosh, thank you so much. And what's cool is they now send me their anniversary. They're like, I'm at a hundred days. And I'm like, yes, I want to celebrate that with you. Okay, I want to get back, though, for a second about this idea of health, because I don't think that I really bought into this. Like, I was kind of like, My health is fine. I have always been a healthy person. I have always been like, right, all these things. And before I stopped drinking in January of 2023, and I don't think I've shared this super publicly like this, so maybe this is the time to do it. I woke up in the middle of the night Around 1230, one o'clock in the middle of the night, I had to go to the bathroom, but my heart was racing, like really racing, and my left arm was throbbing. So, for those of you who have not been to the American Heart Association Go Red for Women Luncheon when your left arm throbs, when you have pain in your left arm, for women, it can mean that you may be having a heart attack. Not always, but my heart is going crazy. I woke Shane Langford up in the middle of the night. I would love to tell you that I was calm. I was not calm. F bombs were flying. I'm like, you have to call 9 1 1 right now. I'm like screaming. I've been in the go red for women. I'm having a heart attack. Paramedics come. They do a portable EKG. My heart rate is 155 and that was by the time the paramedics got there. So it was, it was really high. What they said was you're not having a heart attack, you're having a panic attack. And I was like, that's really weird because I've had panic attacks before and they've never been like this. So, okay. The next, so they said, we can take you to the hospital. You can wait for eight hours or you can just wait for eight hours and call your doctor. So I did that super long story short. I was diagnosed at the age of 43 with hyperthyroid. Typically if you get a hyper, not a hypothyroid, it happens in your 20s and 30s. It does not typically happen in your 40s. But one of the things that happens with hyperthyroid is that your heart races. It is in a constant, my resting heart rate was about 105. It was insane.

Molly Smith: 31:21

gosh.

Caytie Langford: 31:22

insane. You have these panic attacks. Although my endocrinologist tells me it's not a panic attack, but that's really all they know. I mean, that's kind of what we call them. Exactly. And describe it. You also have anxiety that is through the roof. I already have anxiety. I didn't need more. Your metabolism shoots through the roof. I lost 18 pounds without even trying. Most people were congratulating me. I'm not even kidding. I had this bitch that we went to high school with that was in my class, not your class. And I will say that she was such a bitch. Okay. I see her now. I will turn around and walk down the street the opposite way. I don't even care. She put on blast on Facebook, how great I look and how much I should be so happy that I dropped some pounds. And I was like, lady, you do not even know what in the hell is happening in my life. That was, I was the second person in our class that she happened to publicly comment about weight. On Facebook. So, anywho, just, not everybody who loses weight, it's not always a good thing. But I, I digress. I get back to, when this was happening, because of my anxiety, I thought I was dying. So, every night, I would not go to sleep, because I kept thinking that I was going to die in my sleep. I

Molly Smith: 32:45

Oh gosh,

Caytie Langford: 32:46

mean, if I met, I met a doctor at happy hour one time with my girlfriend, she's like, I'm a doctor. I'm like, Oh my God, am I dying? Like this is how bad it was getting. Thank goodness. My numbers, I got with an endocrinologist, I'm on meds, all the things. But when Molly says contend for your health and the health is at the foundation of everything that you are doing, it is not joke. The five months that it took me to figure out what was happening. To get in to see an endocrinologist, which are so hard to get in to see. To get my meds, to get meds that even started working, to get It was probably longer than five months, probably about eight months. It was so hard. Life was so hard. And so contending for my health during that time and contending for it now looks very different. But I also just did a Teladoc appointment yesterday. Cause I've had a sinus infection for two weeks and I was like, I'll just, I'll be fine. I'll be fine. I've been on meds for 24 hours and I feel like a totally different human. So if we don't take care of our health, everything else can go to shit.

Molly Smith: 33:54

Yeah. Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 33:56

And when I look at 44, I'm like, okay, well I really am in midlife. That's kind of weird and I don't really like saying it, but like, this is why we have to do it. So, I want you to talk a little bit, Molly, about this 1 percent thing,

Molly Smith: 34:17

Yes.

Caytie Langford: 34:17

this compound interest. Because I've been the woman that's made these big sweeping gestures, and then I fall flat on my face. So, give us some more thoughts, ideas like, tell us more about that idea of 1 percent every day.

Molly Smith: 34:34

Yeah. So start with the basics. So again, the way we build habits. We do small things, right? You don't go from doing no sit ups or crunches to doing a hundred a day. Right? So the idea is make it so easy. You got to have a cue, right? We're talking about habit loops here. So, you know James clear, you know habit loops, all the things. So you need a cue. You need to make it so easy that it becomes routine to do that. You've got no excuse not to do it. Right? And so you start with the foundation. So, like, for example, like, if you're not drinking, you know, 80 ounces of water a day, right? Find yourself a Yeti or a Stanley or whatever. This holds 32 ounces. I know I need to drink at least three to four of these a day. Right? And so, and I drink it through a straw because I drink it faster through the straw. I drink it room temperature because I drink it faster room temperature. Who knew? so those little things, so the micro habit here, the 1 percent things is have this filled up on my bedside table at night. And when I hit the ground in the morning, I grab it and I start drinking. That's a 1 percent change. That's a 1 percent change. Another thing that I do. I eat six times a day. I've lost all my weight doing that. I've maintained my weight loss and I'm going to the next level with my health and my body composition right now. but I track, I've got a little app where it reminds me to, Oh, I got to go fuel my body. I need to go eat. And so I use that app. Now, yeah. My body clock is probably pretty good, but life happens, work emergencies happen, right? And then I get off kilter. So I use that app. Do I have to use it? No, but that ritual of having that reminder gives me the trigger to say, Oh, yeah, I need to go make that protein shake. Right? So these small things that you can do again, like. Isolated by themselves seem very small and insignificant stack up over time and it takes a long time to build those habits and it takes a long time to to disrupt bad habits. Right? And that's part of the process too. Right? You know, I think of like, just bad coping mechanisms that we have, you know, disrupting a bad coping mechanism know, you have to have a prompt and you've got to have something to replace it. that's a better choice, right?

Caytie Langford: 36:58

Yeah.

Molly Smith: 36:59

All of this takes a level of self awareness and a desire to want to make a difference, to make a change in your life, right? I can't give somebody desire. I can't give somebody awareness. I can try to awaken intrinsic motivation in somebody, but when I'm working with people, it's like, Hey, what's one thing that you can do? I don't want you to do a hundred setups or a hundred crunches. What can you do? What can I do when I'm faced with a situation? I'm always asking myself, okay, what can I do?

Caytie Langford: 37:34

Yeah. I love this. And one of the things that you said earlier that I think is kind of just genius and I, I don't know what your thoughts are or what the research says, like I hate when people say, Oh, it only takes 21 days for a habit or whatever that's to me, that's crap. Like it's total crap to stop drinking. It took about 200 days before I was like, Oh, I really am good and don't need this. But even that, I had to, there were triggers, and I had to replace the habit, right? So, If I wanted a drink at 501, instead I would walk outside my door and take three walks around the block. So I would disrupt my normal habit. But one of the things I love that you said was, okay, when you go somewhere, just park further out. Like, I've never really thought about, like, I'm always thinking, how can I park close? But then the other thing, so our elevator in our building was down. We're in a mid rise, we're only on the sixth floor, so it's actually not that bad. And our old high rise in Dallas, we were on the 14th floor, so a little higher, right? And one day, during Armageddon, Alaska get in, whatever, the Ice mageddon, we did have to walk up and down those 14 flights, like, four times. And it, it's a lot, but one of the things you just said that I think is really cool is like, we leave every day. We go somewhere, even if it's, we walk to, I mean, we walk to lunch because we're in downtown Austin, we can walk everywhere, but like right now, I don't want to walk up six flights, but what I could do for the next two weeks is take the elevator to the fifth floor and then walk the last one and then do that for a couple of weeks. And then go to the fourth floor and work my way up so that in a few weeks, I'm just walking all six and it's not even a big deal.

Molly Smith: 39:27

That's exactly

Caytie Langford: 39:28

I haven't even thought about doing it. Like I hadn't thought, we'll break it down and make it smaller and easier.

Molly Smith: 39:34

What can you do or walk up, walk up to the second floor and grab the elevator?

Caytie Langford: 39:38

Yeah, exactly. Okay. I love this. All right. We could talk for so much longer and I don't want to end, but I do want to do this. You were in a place you were really thinking about external validation. You were climbing the ladder. It was success. It was, it was all the accolades. You had this shift. You had this mind shift. You've been coaching for five years. What I want to talk about, though, is who is the Molly of today, and specifically, what are the opportunities that have come into your life, especially over the last 8 to 12 months, that if someone told you in 2018 would be your life, you would have laughed at them and be like, what are you talking about? Or even 2019 or even in 2020, like, right. If you had to look back at your old self, what would you be shocked that you're doing today?

Molly Smith: 40:36

my gosh. Fabulous question. I will tell you that if you had told me in, in 2020 or before that, in that this year in 2024, I would be working three quarter time in a corporate role, completely aligned to my skill set and passion that I, you know, started my work day at 930 and ended it, you know, around, you I don't know, 3. 30, 4 o'clock, sometimes 4. 30. You know and, you know, 2. 30 on Fridays, and I had the ability to coach more people, to expand my coaching business, and be writing Not only my first solo book, but I'm also participating in two other anthologies. So three book projects, like I would have, I would have laughed at, I would have, there's, I was, there's no way there's no way, because that's exactly what, like, not the book piece, but definitely the, Giving more time into corporate and then and then winding that down as my coaching is winding up is exactly what I said would be amazing in 2020 and I've manifested it. So now that did not come without a lot of mental and emotional baggage and a lot of growth and a lot of. Therapy, you know, all the things, right? It did not come about the way I thought it would, but man alive, I am so very grateful for where I am right now in my corporate career with my coaching business, with my writing and with the doors that are opening. In the last eight to 12 months, guarantee you that these doors would not have opened had I been drinking. There is no question because I, the version of me that showed up as a result of getting sober and stopping the one to three glasses of wine every day would not have been available to see the opportunity that was in front of me. The conversations that I had, groups that I was a part of, the connections that I made on Facebook and Instagram, I would not have been, I would not have been available as a person

Caytie Langford: 42:59

Yep.

Molly Smith: 42:59

had I not made those change. I mean, talk about like so many game changing trajectory shifters in our lives. And I'll tell you when I was going through the shift in my corporate role a little over a year ago. I knew it was going to be big. It was the hardest conversation I've ever had in my corporate career, because I looked at my boss dead in the eye. And I said, if this is what's required for me to be successful in 2023, that I'm not the right person for the role. And as somebody who was climbing the corporate ladder for the last 15 years is the only female executive in the company to say that, and, See how it just see what has come as a result of that. Like that is that is divine intervention from the time I stopped drinking until all, I mean, all of it. So that none of that would have happened. Right.

Caytie Langford: 43:57

Yeah. Yeah.

Molly Smith: 43:59

Game changer.

Caytie Langford: 44:00

Yeah. It is. It's such a game changer. And listen, I know that there's someone out there that's listening and they're like, But there's that study that says that red wine. You know, they tell me to drink responsibly, right? Like this is literally marketed to us in alcohol commercials, drink responsibly. And I was one of those people that bought into all of the propaganda and BS hook, line, and sinker. I was the total a hole that if like, I met you at a happy hour and you said you didn't drink, I would look at you and be like, why, what is wrong with you? Like, I thought something was wrong with you, not something was wrong with me that I had bought into this idea that this was good for me, or made me feel better, or let me be more of who I was. I remember probably 150 days in, and when I stopped drinking last year, May 8th, 2023. It was, listen, Memorial Day was right around the corner, July 4th, Labor Day, our, some of our best friends have summer birthdays. We were known to be at pool parties every weekend. Like we had to make massive shifts and changes, briefly because I couldn't be around it. I was like, I just can't, right? It was hard. I'm not going to lie and say that stopping drinking is easy. The drinking part for me actually became a lot easier. It was all the other changes in every relationship. That was hard AF. But, I will say, I mean, nothing that, like, like I didn't realize my brain could be this clear.

Molly Smith: 45:51

Yup.

Caytie Langford: 45:52

I didn't realize I could be this creative. I didn't know you could wake up and feel rested, right? And so,

Molly Smith: 46:02

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 46:03

there's somebody right now who's like, but there's that one article that was written in 1993 that says red wine is healthy. It's not, it's not, it's not, it's not. Just Google women, alcohol, and cancer. Y'all, it is insane. It is insane. So that's my soapbox on that, especially when we tie it into health. And I love that you said that that has also been a trigger for you for all of these other things. I'm so freaking proud of you, this book stuff. And here's the other thing, this book stuff, how cool is it that you then invited me into this group? I know I got to get on the calls weekly. And I mean, again, so you put another step forward and now I may benefit from it. Cause I'm like, Oh,

Molly Smith: 46:52

Come on.

Caytie Langford: 46:53

come hang out with these awesome women. And so no matter what it is that you as a human who are listening to this, no matter what you want to do, just when Molly says that our health is at the cornerstone, the foundation of everything. What's crazy is four years ago, five years ago is actually not that long ago, right? When we look at the whole breadth of our life there's a quote, I can't remember exactly who said it, but they said, we overestimate what we can do in a year and underestimate what we can do in a decade. And what's really cool is you are about four to five years into this decade, right? This period. And. You're like scratching the surface of what's about to happen.

Molly Smith: 47:40

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

Caytie Langford: 47:44

Unbelievable.

Molly Smith: 47:45

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 47:46

Unbelievable. So exciting. Okay. Molly, where can people find you? Where do you hang out? How do you like to connect?

Molly Smith: 47:55

Yeah. So right now the best place to reach me connect to me on Facebook. My handle is Molly Moore Smith. I'm on Instagram is molly. positivepants. And you can reach me molly at mollypositivepants. com. And I would love to connect and unpack any of these things. If you're interested in health or not sure where to go to reach your health goals, I would be honored to have a conversation with you. I'm developing some tools for a mindset course. So doing some mindset coaching, all the things all practical tools. I'm all about putting practical tools in your hands to help you show up as the best version of you. So I would love to connect and continue the conversation and serve anybody who's listening in any way I can.

Caytie Langford: 48:44

I love that, Molly. I love this idea of 1 percent better. 1 percent every day doesn't feel daunting. Right? And there are some days you might not do 1%. You might do no percent. But I definitely have been the girl that's tried to go and do 90 percent in a day's jump, and it's just not possible. It's not possible, and it's not, it doesn't, it doesn't last.

Molly Smith: 49:06

not

Caytie Langford: 49:07

so, it's not. So part of not being subtle, right? Part of this idea of As you said, during your transformation, during that moment, before things started happening, you started percolating on this idea of, is there more? Is there more for me? Is there more impact I can make? Is there more that I can become? Is there something inside of me that we haven't even talked about this, but like, Oh, let me just ask you this. Okay. So we just talked about like all the cool stuff. I would love to know the mindset stuff

Molly Smith: 49:52

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 49:52

from a,

Molly Smith: 49:53

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 49:55

what do you tell yourself now? Like, what are the conversations you have with yourself now that even five years ago you would have been like, dude, I wasn't saying that to myself.

Molly Smith: 50:05

Yeah. So when I'm in a funk, when I'm out of sorts I, I have to check in. I don't know about you, but like, I have a feelings wheel. Have you seen the feelings wheel?

Caytie Langford: 50:18

No. No.

Molly Smith: 50:19

my gosh. So just Google feelings wheel. But it's all of the different feelings. So I'm 48 years old. I'm just in this season of trying to name the feeling that I'm feeling, right? Because it all comes back to those emotions, right? So what is that feeling that I'm feeling? And then just acknowledging it and sitting with it. And not trying to numb it, escape it, drown it out, right? With Pinot Noir or Grey's Anatomy, pick your poison, right? I've done it all. And so when I find myself in a funk, I have to check in with the emotion and the feeling that's going on, but I also do what I call a mindset inventory. I've kind of dubbed it a mindset inventory. And I asked myself a series of questions. About what is going into the mind, right? So if our brain is the hardware, our mind and our mindset are the software. So when we do a mindset inventory, we're, we're doing a little check into the source code and seeing what bugs are in there. Right? So I asked myself, what am I reading? What am I watching? What am I scrolling? How long am I scrolling? who am I spending time with? Do I come away from those interactions feeling better or worse about myself? And then I say, okay, what's out of alignment for me? So let me give you a good example after, I quit drinking last year, I replaced it with binge watching, you know, Grey's Anatomy, which I've seen a gazillion times on my phone. Like that's what I used to escape. And I realized that it was holding me back. I was spending all of my white space. binge watching crap I'd seen a gazillion times. So I deleted all of the streaming apps off my phone. Okay. Then I realized, okay, so I'll watch it on the big TV, which is fine. And then I'm like playing Candy Crush or Farm Hero Saga. Gotta take that shit off my phone. So I took all that stuff off my phone because I realized that I was finding a replacement for the thing that I was trying to escape. So that's why it's like, okay, I had to check in with my feelings and emotions, Try to sit with them a little bit, just acknowledge it. And then, The coping mechanism, the reading, the watching, the scrolling, we've got so much access to the cheap dopamine And so like just two weeks ago, I was scrolling the Tik TOK too much. And it was like, Oh, I'm gonna catch up with the dogs and the people that I love, to follow, you know? And so I'm like, I got to take Tik TOK off my phone for a little bit. Because I'm finding myself navigating and wasting white space time that I could be unwinding in a, in a healthier way than that. And so that my, the mindset inventory is just that mental checklist of what's out of whack. And then can I make a small change, a 1 percent change?

Caytie Langford: 53:02

Yeah. Molly, do you have this mindset chuck in this mindset inventory as a download?

Molly Smith: 53:08

Not yet. I'm working on it, sister. It will be.

Caytie Langford: 53:12

Girl, I feel like we need a download. Okay. We need to download. If Molly gets a download before this goes live, I will leave a note on this because I think we're going to try and make that happen.

Molly Smith: 53:27

Okay. Let's do it. Yeah. I really, the goal is to do an assessment. I want an assessment with recommendations and all of that stuff. But yes, I do have a list of questions that I asked. We could probably formalize that into a download.

Caytie Langford: 53:40

Oh my gosh. I think that every single woman needs to download that like yesterday because that is a tool that you can go back to over and over and over. And every time you're kind of going to get a different thing. And I will say this, like, let me just 20 something years with wine feeling feelings has been hard,

Molly Smith: 54:05

A hundred percent. A hundred percent.

Caytie Langford: 54:07

I didn't even know what I was doing. I was like, what is this? Why am I feeling

Molly Smith: 54:11

Oh yeah. You and me both.

Caytie Langford: 54:12

But, but what's crazy is when you were just saying this I've become a Dateline junkie. I've watched every episode of Dateline like every episode, like going back to the nineties like that. I, because that's how I, I replaced wine with that in Dateline. I'm kind of caught up. I only get to watch the new ones. So recently I started 2020. All right. So I need this inventory and I need to look at this wheel because I need to sit with some of this stuff. Tell us really quickly, what is white space?

Molly Smith: 54:44

Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 54:44

I think I understand, but I want to make

Molly Smith: 54:46

Yep. So it's that downtime, right? It's that downtime when you are. after, the bulk of your workday is done, you're transitioning to whatever you do in the evening and you're doing that kind of unwind, like decompress time. Everybody needs that decompress time. That is good, but you don't need 2 hours scrolling. Tick tock or watching 2020. And so there's a place for those things. I'm not saying you don't do those things. I'm not saying TikTok is going to be deleted forever, but the next time I watch TikTok, I might set a timer for 30 minutes.

Caytie Langford: 55:18

Yeah.

Molly Smith: 55:19

me a cue to say, okay, I got to go like do something else because that imprints on the mindset and it impacts how you show up. It impacts your thoughts, your thoughts impact your beliefs, and your beliefs fuel your actions. So if you aren't curating what's going in here, how you are showing up in the world for the assignments that are meant for you is going to change. It's gonna not be the, the the best that you have to offer. curating that mindset, I do a mindset inventory probably every three weeks, easily. I'm like, okay, something's out of whack here. Something's out of whack. Right. Cause I can sense it with how I'm showing up. Yeah.

Caytie Langford: 56:00

about this also, you have just given me language to things that I'm experiencing. So one of the things that happened for me when I was having my intake of alcohol was through the roof, was I would have what I would call 3. 30 AM meetings with myself. It would be the time where my body would wake myself up and it would be like, okay, the alcohol has worn off or is wearing off and you've avoided all this stuff. So now we want to talk about it. And so I would sit up at night and probably for about an hour to an hour and a half, I would typically beat myself up. That's what those used to look like. Now, since I am not having alcohol, I do not have them every night, which is phenomenal. And when I have them, I'm typically not beating myself up. But what I have just understood from you putting this term white space, when I am not giving my brain enough time to decompress, to think through things, I will wake up in the middle of the night and my brain will be like, cool, now I want to think about the thing that you've been avoiding. So, so for me, it's happening in the middle of the night. Some people, they wake up early and they wake up late, right? When I am the most rested is when I have given my brain time to do cool stuff, be in my strengths, but also like download stuff that I got to get out of it. Work through and process things. Yeah, my gosh.

Molly Smith: 57:31

Even if you use a little bit of that white space to do that,

Caytie Langford: 57:34

Yeah.

Molly Smith: 57:35

you're filing those things away in your brain and you're open and available for other things.

Caytie Langford: 57:42

Yeah. Yeah. Lady. Let's. I'm just going to put this out there. Let's like figure something out around this white space. Like there's a, I don't know, there's something, there's a, there's a class we could do. Like we can do another whole podcast episode. Like. I don't know.

Molly Smith: 58:00

Let's do it.

Caytie Langford: 58:01

hitting on something that, that is so exciting to me because we're just not doing it. Right? And, and again, like we've talked a little bit about alcohol and not everyone. I know some people who are like, damn, Caytie. I didn't know you drink that much. Yeah. No kidding. I hid it from you. That was on purpose. And so a lot of people are like, I don't drink that much. That's good. That's good. I don't. I would not recommend it. If you are not doing it, don't try it. But there are a lot of women who are using other things, right? The Grey's Anatomy, the Dateline, the 2020, the TikTok,

Molly Smith: 58:35

acceptable things.

Caytie Langford: 58:36

that's right, that's right. And society is telling us to do that, right? Like, let's not lie. If you're not paying something for something, you are the product. You are the product for Facebook, TikTok, Instagram, LinkedIn. I don't think a lot of people are hanging out on LinkedIn just to hang out, but you know, if you're, if you're not paying for it, you're, you're the product. So,

Molly Smith: 59:02

For sure.

Caytie Langford: 59:02

my gosh, Molly. All right. This has been amazing. We're going to link all of those things. I personally am so freaking proud of you. Because I know, I know the messy middle that you've gone through. And first of all, I just want to thank you for letting me be a part of that. And thank you for letting me be a part of this, where you are reaping so much from what you have sown. And you're getting this harvest and I think it's amazing and wonderful. And I love you dearly as a friend. I'm sad that we're not in person to give you a hug. But yeah, keep kicking ass lady. Cause you have so much impact to make in the world.

Molly Smith: 59:45

Oh, thank you. Thank you. And thank you for how you've shown up in the different phases of my life. To help me do the things you're right up there with my husband, Jeff, to see a front row for a lot of this stuff. So it's an honor to just talk with you and share with your audience and add some value and let's collaborate more in the future.

Caytie Langford: 1:00:09

Yeah,

Molly Smith: 1:00:10

Come on.

Caytie Langford: 1:00:11

happening. I'm I'm already. Yes. I love it. I love it

Molly Smith: 1:00:15

good.

Caytie Langford: 1:00:16

until next time, ladies.

Caytie: 1:00:18

thanks for tuning in to Not Made To Be Subtle. Remember, life's journey is rarely straightforward, but it's the twists and the turns that make it worth living. Embrace the uncertainty, make bold decisions, and never underestimate your power to create the life that you envision. Will you do me a favor? Will you rate and review and subscribe? This helps more women like you find our podcast. Stay tuned for more episodes packed with insights, inspiration, and a touch of badass boldness.